While female hunters are the fastest-growing demographic in the industry, it is very important to consider the best ways to talk to and mentor female hunters. As much as the feminist movement would like to make us all believe that women are the same as men, we all know that is a far cry from the reality of the world.
I am not at all implying that women need to be handled with kid gloves while they are hunting. (although the feminist movement would like to imply that men and women are the same, we do have our differences) I am implying that good communication between men and women (especially spouses!) can make or break an incredible day in the field. So, let's get into some tips for mentoring female hunters...
While I am indeed married to the best guy in the world, that is not to say we haven’t sparred over rogue comments and miscommunications. I shall just put out there, that we may have had a horrible argument at 12,000 feet on horseback. The day started as an epic hunt, turned into a loud and childish argument that led to a seven-mile ride out in total silence. There may or may not have been profanity, tears of rage, and childish silent treatments. I can neither confirm nor deny.
Let’s just say that we learned a lot about hunting together after that day.
Women view hunting from an entirely different perspective. It’s not that we are "sensitive". It’s not that we are argumentative. We just see things differently. Correctly understanding those differences can help you avoid a very long and silent horseback ride out of the backcountry. Whether you are an older, married couple, just dating, or simply a guided hunting with female clients– you can thank me later when you have dazzling success with the following tips.
Take a few minutes while driving or riding in to ask questions. Discuss and agree upon tactics. Discuss equipment. Discuss timeline plans. This eliminates surprises and frustrations.
This is important. Let her decide exactly what type of animal she plans to harvest. You may want her to bag that 200” muley while she may be happy with something much smaller. Discuss it early because failure to do so can result in hard feelings and frustration on both sides. Often, women want to simply have a successful hunt to fill the freezer. They aren’t always (but sometimes they are!) after the biggest animal. Again, the hunt is hers and the trophy is in the eye of the beholder. Respect her choice and support it. Harmony shall ensue!
Before you head out on the hunt, honestly take time to practice with your weapon of choice together. I have personally found this to be very beneficial for a lot of reasons. For starters, she needs to know that she, her firearm, and her optics are all cooperating. She needs to have her significant other there as well for troubleshooting and discussions. But most importantly, if there are any hiccups, you can work through them together. This makes a huge difference on the hunt and when the time comes to shoot, you will know she is as prepared and skilled as possible. You both will know you have both worked to troubleshoot any issues. She will know she is as prepared as possible which makes confidence hit a high mark. This all works to reduce any friction, frustration, and/or unsolicited advice.
This goes for most people regardless of gender and situation. But for the sake of this article, it is politely directed toward the men. It is natural for men to want to advise while hunting, especially if the man has been the woman’s teacher and mentor over the years. Women don’t always want advice, even you think she needs it. And as anyone in a relationship knows, advice from our significant other can sometimes be difficult to receive. We have ALL been there (reflect my mountainside combat noted above). Wait for her to ask for advice unless it is a critical event.
Experienced female hunters have tons of skill and expertise. Respect and acknowledge her skill. And, should you be in a position where your advice is imperative, try this: Ask her if you can give her some advice. Funny thing, she is going to have to say yes to that! Now, with any advice, she may or may not follow it and that will be on her.
Nothing is worse than a missed shot, but we have all experienced this. And no one is more devastated than the shooter. This is also not the best time for comments like, “Where were you aiming?” or “What were you looking at in your scope?”. While they are not questions that are totally out of line, they are somewhat ridiculous when aimed at an experienced hunter. Of course she was aiming at the kill zone. Of course she was looking at the animal and finding the shot placement. Something just went wrong. Try this instead: Ask her what she think happened.
All hunters pretty much know the second the shot goes off what they may have done wrong, and letting her process her frustration is better than fueling it.
This is so important. Even if the hunt didn’t go exactly the way you had planned, a successful hunt should be happily celebrated. It goes a long way to tell you're significant other that you are proud of them… no matter what gender you are!
So there you have it, simple tips to salvaging your relationship during hunting season. You can thank me later. Consider this free marriage counseling!